A couple of months ago, I walked over a zebra crossing. A car stopped to let me cross the road. I gave the driver a smile and a cheerful nod of gratitude. But before I knew it, I was struck.
Well, not by a car, but by the idea that this actually was an odd situation. Through some mere lines on that single piece of road, I knew that the driver had to stop and that same driver expected me to cross the road. If one of us hadn’t followed this rule, it would most definitely have resulted in frustration for at least one of us.
This simple rule made me exchange trust and being humane with expectations towards the other based on an external rule. It struck me to realize that this isn’t only the case within traffic. In fact, all of our rules and regulations have this intrinsic property: just consider how many things are subject to regulation. Regulations appear to externalize trust. No wonder why we have been alienating from ourselves and eachother at such a rapid pace.
I firmly believe that if we slowly start undoing ourselves from as many external regulations as possible, we will give ourselves some space for consciousness to grow & develop from within. Now, wouldn’t that be nice?
I would love to hear your opinions on this one!
Yours truly,
Jeroen
Or like a professor at Nyenrode University mentioned:
‘The fact that we live in a world of exceedingly more rules is an indication of two things:
1. We live in a world that’s getting more and more complex and we need rules to make sense of it all
and/or
2. We trust each other less and less
‘
Very true IMO.
I agree that we need to undo ourselves from as many external regulations as possible. But looking at your zebracrossing-experience I also see possibilities to connect with each other because there are rules. You had some kind of connection with the driver because he stopped for you. Maybe that is logical because that are the rules… you can’t take it for granted though. If I did, I would be dead right now.
What I am trying to say is that you can still make a huge difference by the way you cope with those rules. You looked at the driver friendly and nodded. That is a choice. You could have taken the stop for granted and decide not to make eye-contact. I can make a lot of excuses to do so (I was in a hurry, really really need to make a phone call, I was thinking about a guy etc.). I am not saying that we need to wave en smile the whole day. But it is a choice. We can live a little bit more in the ‘now’ and make those little moments of contact.
Everybody knows this one:
The bus/tram driver who waits a bit longer because he sees you running towards the bus stop.
I don’t know about you, but that makes my day.
Yes it happens quite often that he doesn’t stop… but hey; that are the rules :)
I could do without the rules, but I don’t know if we all can do without the rules. actually I’m not so sure that I can…
(I know the frustration. do you nod because you want to be nice to the driver or do you nog because you’re surprised that he actually stops? it’s odd that it works like this, but I guess the world is better off with the nodding than without.)
nod,
Ferdinand
Amen!
Something else…
Have you already figured out how you can Love yourself out of ‘authority’ rule circumstances. I passed several restrictive governmental non sense in Ghana by moving from controlable fear into incontrolable Love. Even the technical equipement just jammed :-)
Figured it out in NL in the train. 4 ‘tough’ security guys, handcuffs at their belt passed my by in a small second class compatement. They didn’t even notice me. I realised it was because I was enjoying myself in an enlightened state. Which cannot be perceived in a fear based control system.
I wrote about it here: https://kimpassie.wordpress.com/2012/06/11/love-trust-how-does-it-work/
Last example, I left the Tax system with their consent (they had to) by looking at the reflection of myself in them, and changing myself which pushed them out of my reality. i live outside of the Dutch financial institutions and ‘insurances’ (for what they are worth anyway. i have become my own insurance.
Your sit is very inspiring Jeroen. Thank you! Definately on the same mission!
Thanks a lot for the article post.Much thanks again. Cool.